25th August 2014 - Edinburgh Fringe Festival 2014

Well, here it is. My review of Edinburgh.

My trip to Edinburgh took place across just over a week, starting on the 8th August, and ultimately ending on the 17th August. So why do I do? Do I write and release a blog while all the events are still fresh in my mind? Do I do so while the shows are all still on, so the recommendations actually have some weight? No. I wait until the day after the Fringe has finished, when everyone else is releasing their Fringe recap blogs on the same day. Great work, Tom!

There is one recommendation I can throw your way, however. A show that I really loved, entitled Danny Mayo Presents: The Land of Giants. It stars two members of The Spook School, a band I have declared my love for on numerous occasions. Not only are they talented musicians; they are also very funny comedians. This is summed up by their promotional material for the show:

Adam is the the runner-up, Chortle Student Comedy Award 2013; "star in the making" - Steve Bennett. 

Anna is "quite witty" - ThreeWeeks.

Their show was a free show, in a venue that can only be described as "out of the way", in that wonderfully quirky way that many great Fringe shows are. It was a brilliant hour, full of wit, silliness, charm, fun, and a song about onions. I genuinely don't know what more you could possibly want from a comedy show. If you are in or near London, I strongly suggest you pop along to their London performance of their show, details of which can be found by clicking here. Not only are they doing their hour, but another member of the band, Niall, is also doing his show. While I haven't seen his show, it should be pointed out that he does have a mustache, so bear that in mind. Tickets are only £3 in advance, which is an absolute snip. Sadly, I cannot make the gig (I am gigging in Brighton on the same night), but if I were free, I'd have already bought my ticket. There's only 23 tickets left, and it is on September 3rd. Get to it!

As a final note about The Land of Giants (the official name of their double-act), I got the pleasure - along with Sam, who came with me to most of the things I saw in Edinburgh - of hanging out with both Anna and Adam after their show, sharing drinks and laughs. It was lovely. They are very nice. It was a rare occurrence, in that we were four awkward people around a table, but it felt comfortable, despite the fact that we'd - bar some Twitter exchanges here and there - just met. The magic of Edinburgh.

Above is a photo of me and Sam both wearing The Spook School T-shirts, taken by Anna.

From our favourite free show, to our favourite paid show: Will Seaward's Spooky Midnight Ghost Stories. A midnight show, where Will Seaward - you guessed it - told ghost stories. I've read at least 3 reviews that compare him favourably to Brian Blessed, and I'd have to agree with them, for three reasons: his booming voice, his large stature, and the fact he's bloody hilarious. As we entered the venue, he greeted each audience member, saying "enter at your own free will"; once the room started to fill, he said to the audience "are you comfortable?", before starting to turn away, turning back, and following that question with "are you ghost comfortable?" - it set the silly and hilarity bars high early on, and they stayed there. His stories were peppered with silliness, non-sequiturs, and - most importantly - massive laughs, and I really mean massive. Of all the shows I've seen at the Fringe over my 3 trips, this was the one with the biggest laughs, and at a very consistent rate. Our enjoyment of the show is encapsulated by the fact that it was the first time I've seen a stand-up show in Edinburgh twice; the second time, we gave him a standing ovation. I'm not sure if he's a big enough name to tour the show far-and-wide yet, but if you find yourself in Edinburgh next year - and he's doing a show - make sure you see him.

I did see another show twice, but it wasn't a stand-up show: Mark Watson's Comedywealth Games. I really loved. Not only was it an hour of solid laughs, but it felt like a proper one-off Fringe event each night. The concept of the show was that 3 comedians are pitted against each-other, each representing a Commonwealth nation, and have to compete against each-other at numerous "sports". The audience is split into 3, with each third supporting a comedian assigned by Watson. These sports ranged from the 100m sack race (including having to pack the 'sacks' - in this case, sleeping bags - back into their drawstring bag to win the race), to "The Admin Pentathlon", where comedians (along with an audience volunteer) had to do 7 tasks all within 5 minutes. These tasks included sifting through a big bag of mixed vegetables and separating them into their separate veg; pairing socks; giving a makeover; texting a message to someone from the country you're representing (with the winner being whoever got a response first); and seeing who can eat the most yoghurts while running on a treadmill for 1 minute. During my 2nd viewing of this show, my friend and fellow comedian, Adele Cliff, volunteered to help Andrew Maxwell. Needless to say, they won, largely due to Adele.

A photo I took just before the Pentathlon started.

The best event (no offense, Adele!), however, was the final event of the show. This event involved the comedians having to put as many layers of clothes from the audience on as possible during 1 minute. This led to comedians running into the audience begging for clothes, people throwing clothes towards the comedians on stage, people getting up from their seats to hang scarves, belts, bras and everything else on any piece of their comedian that is free, like some beautiful human Buckaroo. The rules dictated that they got 1 point for a typical piece of clothing, and 2 points for underwear. On the first show I went to, Jason Byrne received 30 points (beating the previous record of 16 by a massive margin) - without any underwear. I think the photo says it all.

Keep in mind he stood like this for around 3 minutes while the other comedians' clothe-count was established. It's fair to say he was rather boiling.

There was another show that stood out for similar reasons to the Comedywealth Games; another show that was a mixture of silly, madcap comedy, fueled by comedians competing against each-other. McNeil and Pamphilon Go 8-Bit was an interactive videogame show. It involved the audience being split into 2 - one side supporting McNeil, one side Pamphilon - as each host was represented by a comedian competing against another comedian at various videogames, including Mario Kart Double Dash, Street Fighter, and Bomberman. The string in the tail? For whichever team's representative that lost, the respective host had to do a forfeit. My favourite of these involved McNeil playing the first level of Pac-Man, something that he managed to complete in around 57 seconds. Easy enough? Sure. But then, all of the 100-strong members of team Pamphilon were given a Mini Cheddar to hold up, and McNeil's challenge was to run up the aisle, through the audience, and eat every Mini Cheddar - then run back to the stage - within 57 seconds. Amazingly, he did it. As a lover of Mini Cheddars, Pac-Man, and eating too much, it was one of my genuine highlights of the Fringe.

I didn't just watch comedy shows, though. I made a conscious effort to make sure I saw a nice variety of shows, one of which was EastEnd Cabaret: Sexual Tension. I've never been to a cabaret show before, so this was completely new to me. But y'know what? It was good fun. I enjoyed the songs, the forward nature of the act, and there were some funny jokes along the way. I don't think it'll be the last cabaret show I see at the Fringe. Another show that was different from my normal type of show was Morgan and West: Parlour Tricks, a magic show with a sprinkling of comedy. It was genuinely impressive to watch, even as someone who is only a very casual fan of magic. The narrative of the show was well-written, too; A very nicely put-together hour.

There were a huge number of other shows I loved at the Fringe; Ray Peacock's show was brilliant, as you'd expect. On the final night, I watched Comedy Countdown, which - even though it is "only" comedians spending 90 minutes playing Countdown - was genuinely enjoyable throughout, no doubt thanks largely to the strength of the comedic talents of the host and regulars, respectively. 

I am not going to go in-depth about any more shows, though; there was one man who recommended at least 30 of his friends to me while we were chatting before going into a gig, and I stopped listening after the 4th, at most. There's only so many recommendations you can listen to!

Here is a photo of my hoody, with a load of badges that I got while at the Fringe attached to it.

As for the performing side of the Fringe, things didn't go to plan for me. I feel that I need to establish myself on the circuit first throughout this year, so I can actually get gigs that are worth doing next Fringe, instead of gigs that have audiences in the single digit numbers. One of the gigs I did do was for my friends at the AhhGee Podcast as part of their live show, which you can find here if you so wish. It also features Loretta Maine, Wilfredo and El Britanico.

Lastly, the Fringe was brilliant because I got to spend time with so many lovely people. Thanks to Sam, PDT, Stainbank, Adele, Michael Bell (DING!), Andy, Grax, Adam and Anna. You're all brilliant. Without you, it would have been 90% less fun.

There you have it. I hope you enjoyed finding out about my Edinburgh Fringe experience of 2014. Feel free to leave comments, ask questions, and/or share this blog if you liked it!

Thanks for reading,

Tom.

A load of flyers from some of the shows I enjoyed. I wanted one from every show that I saw, but sadly I couldn't get flyers from all of them. There's also a CD of the soundtrack from The Land of Giants' show.

21st August 2014 - Update

Oh, hey! It's the blogging guy, who said he'd write every day FOR THE REST OF HIS LIFE! How's it been going, writer-man? Managed to keep it up?

Of course I haven't. Firstly, writing was put to one-side for the time I was in Edinburgh; initially, I was planning to attempt to keep up the habit of writing daily while up there, but I very quickly realised that it would take an hour out of each day, so would it inhibit on my enjoyment of my time up there. Moreover, this would make the blogs either half-arsed, or I would be annoyed at myself for writing them, a feeling which would seep into the writing itself.

I came home from Edinburgh on the Sunday just gone, with my plan being that I would write-up a blog detailing my Edinburgh experience (highlights, lowlights, and most importantly: best food). Said blog was due to be written when I was less tired (who'd have thought that 9 days of late-nights, walking 10+ miles every day, and a 6 hour journey home would leave you feeling knackered?); basically, that was Sunday out of the question for my day to write a long blog.

Then we come to Monday. On Monday afternoon, I received a phone call asking if I was free to come to job interview the next day. The interview was just for a part-time job in a supermarket, so don't get too excited (though it would be a big deal for me to get it, quite frankly). I felt it went really well, which is something I haven't felt after an interview previously. They said they'd get back to me "within 2 days". I took this to mean Thursday, but they could also mean Friday. Despite the fact I felt it went well, I'm still feeling quite worried and nervous today. It wouldn't be my dream job, sure, but it would be a job that is perfect to do alongside my writing ambitions.

Basically, I've not been in a "oh, let's write" mood recently, because there have been more important things to focus on over the last couple of weeks. I'll get back to it soon.

Tom.

8th August 2014 - Give me a job, please.

I have been unemployed officially since January 2013. Yes, that's correct; 17 months. Before that, I went to University for a year, before ultimately dropping out due to depression. Why did I go to University? Because I had been unemployed for a year, and I was sick of it.

That is 31 months/over 2 and a half years of my life that I have been unemployed. This is not my fault (as much as I let it destroy my self-esteem constantly); there just aren't the jobs. Or, rather, there are jobs...but for everyone one job, there are 20 people who are desperate to work applying for it. Case in point below:

As you can see, there was a job I saw advertised on Facebook earlier today, in the group Everything Tring. This is a local group that mainly revolves around my hometown, Tring, and the group has steadily grown to a membership that is just over 4500.

The job advertised was for a part-time cleaner. You will notice that this job is both part-time, and a cleaner. No disrespect to either cleaners or people who work part-time - if I had been in time, I'd have applied myself - but it isn't a top-end job. Far from it. Even for a part-time job, it isn't many hours, being advertised as approximately 12 hours a month. Yet, as you can see, there are at least 8 names who are interested in this position within 2 hours of it being advertised - and these are (mostly) just the names who didn't read the job advertisement correctly, so responded using Facebook instead of e-mailing. Despite this, the job was filled -within 3 hours. Yes. 3 hours. That is how quickly even very low-end jobs go.

Let's re-cap:

12 hours per month.

8 applicants.

Gone in 3 hours.

I do understand that this job would be the ideal job for some; perhaps someone who is a part-time student, or someone who just wants a little extra cash on the side. But it sums up perfectly how desperate the job market is.

Some jobs I've failed to get:

• Seasonal job at Marks and Spencers (after filling out a hour-long application form.)
• A local cleaning job, of which there a mere 6 hours a week were on offer
• Retail jobs at Boots, Tesco, ASDA, Sainsbury's
• Various office admin jobs
• Various reception jobs
• A call-centre
• A garden centre

Basically, jobs I am over-qualified for, sure, but ultimately ones that I am far more than able to do. They might argue I am under-experienced, perhaps...But does it really take that long for someone to pick up how to stack shelves, or clean a floor with a mop? Especially if that person has qualifications that prove they are capable of doing far more than that? Yet, the only way one can gain experience nowadays is via voluntary work or trials which - for some employers - can last for 3 months of unpaid work, for 40 hours, without a guarantee of a job at the end of it. If I look at my school friends, the vast majority of them have either suffered periods of unemployment, or have found jobs through their family. I don't really have any contacts.

It's very annoying that I cannot find work myself.

Fuck it...annoying is an understatement. Sometimes, it can drive me to deep depressive spells. Other times, the lack of income leaves me questioning what I would do for money...would I sell my dignity? My integrity? Beloved possessions? In my current financial state, I fear that I would...if the price was right. That's what really worries me.

Thanks for reading.

Tom.

P.S. £10 for my last Rolo and a high-five? Anyone?

7th August 2014 - A poem entitled "Insecure".

Sad poem alert. Don't read if you don't like sad stuff.

Insecure

You look in the mirror and analyse your reflection,

You hate yourself because you don't see perfection.

Imperfections are normal.
You know this.
Fucking hell. You bloody know this.

But it still hurts. You're still sad.

You still feel the hate for your appearance, despite hating what that hate stands for.

Scars caused by insecurity; scars that lead to more insecurity.

We live in a world where there are people who would trade 10 years of their lifetime to lose 5 stone;

Fuck, some of them do.

It's stupid. So utterly stupid.
You hate the fact they do it, that they're made to do it,

That people can't be happy living as imperfections.

Yet, given the chance, you'd struggle to not do the same.

You have loved the imperfections of others, but hate imperfections of your own.

Despite knowing how ridiculous it is.

Illogical emotions.

But real emotions.

Anger, sadness, pain.

Most of all, deep in your heavy heart,

You are sick of reflecting on your reflection.

Thanks for reading.

Tom.

6th August 2014 - Edinburgh on the horizon...

Within 48 hours, I will once again be in Edinburgh, spending a week taking in the delights of the festival. This, my 3rd trip to the Edinburgh Fringe, will be different from the previous 2. This isn't just because I will be watching different shows (obviously; if I went 3 years in a row and watched exactly the same things every time, I don't think that would be making the most of the incredible choice of shows on offer).

Firstly, my accommodation. During my 1st Fringe Festival, I stayed in a mixture of a hotel and in the flat of an Edinburgh resident. For my 2nd Edinburgh, I stayed in the flat of a different Edinburgh resident. This Edinburgh? I'm back in a hotel, but I am sharing a room with Mr. Sam Bowskill, who has joined me and Dan on our writing challenge (you can find his blog by clicking here). As for next year, there have already been plans discussed that would involve me sharing a flat with a group of my comedian friends (including PDT, who is currently writing an Edinburgh blog that is worth checking out), and staying for the full run; I've wanted to go for the full run ever since my first Edinburgh in 2012, but circumstances - namely, the fact that life hasn't gone to plan at all for me, so I've not been able to get a job - have prevented that from being a possibility. People have been saying that "it'll get better soon" since 2012, so hopefully things will turn around by 2015, or I fear that I will be left behind.

Secondly, this will be the first Edinburgh where I will be performing. While I had done a handful of gigs before my previous 2 Edinburghs, this is the first year where I have actively sought out spots in Edinburgh. I don't feel that I am going up there as a comedian, though; I intend to spend 80% of the time socialising/as a punter. It will be nice to do the odd set here and there this year, mind, before hopefully having my life in order to do it all properly next year.

In terms of shows that I am going to go see, there are very few in my mind that are set in stone; I imagine I will plan most of the shows I'm going to see once I'm up there, seeing as all my previous timetables that I had worked out in advance were pretty much thrown out the window. All I'm certain of is the fact that I will not be seeing a certain comedian named Jim.

As for my daily writing challenge, I am unsure what I am going to get down on paper during the festival; I imagine it will mostly be a mixture of show reviews and stand-up notes, considering all the comedy I'll be seeing. But hey, who knows? I am hoping to see some non-comedy shows this year, too (by that, I mean spoken word/theatre/music shows, not simply comedy shows that are awful), so maybe I'll be inspired to write a poem or something similar while I'm up there?

Thanks for reading.

Tom.

5th August 2014 - In the Club, BBC Drama, episode 1 review

Most people who know me will know that I don't watch much television. Most of my viewing time involves a small number of shows; Pointless, The Simpsons, American Dad!, and various sports shows. However, today, I sat down and watched a new BBC Drama entitled In the Club. It revolves around 6 pregnant couples, all in varying different circumstances. One are a lesbian* couple, one of whom is cheating on her partner with the sperm donor for their child, a man who is also the father of their teenage son (who the one who isn't cheating gave birth to when she was in a previous relationship with him) - which is a bit hard to believe. More believable is their subplot of said teenager son, who is struggling to come to terms with the fact he now has two Mums, referring to his mothers as "just mates" when a classmate asks who he was talking to. There is also a 15 year-old girl who hasn't told anyone she is pregnant, a first-time Mum-to-be who is experiencing an unplanned pregnancy she is still uncertain about, and another first-time Mum who is suffering the typical nerves and worries associated with having your first child.

I didn't initially set-out to watch it, though. To be honest, I had no idea what it was, until I overhead some pieces of intriguing dialogue while making the tea for Mum and Dad. After giving them their drinks and watching for a couple of minutes - mainly because I noticed that John Marquez (who plays a character in Doc Martin, one of my favourite TV shows ever) - was part of the cast. Eventually, I left the room, and spent 5 minutes on the computer, but this couldn't stop my ears from drifting away from the PC towards the living room, where more dialogue was sucking me in.

I also glanced at the screen through the doorway from my seat, and saw that Will Mellor (best known as Gaz in Two Pints of Lager and a Packet of Crisps) was also a member of the cast. Despite not being a huge fan of Two Pints..., it attracted me to see a second known-face; I was furthermore drawn towards the show by the fact that he was playing an unemployed, 37 year-old father of two, with two on the way, who was desperate for a job. His character was shown turning up for an apprenticeship - that he had been sent to by the JobCentre - only to be refused the role because the man in charge "thought they were sending a lad". Despite the fact that character pleaded that he'd been for 19 interviews, was close to losing his house, and would "make the tea, sweep the floor, do anything", the boss refused to give him the job, saying "it wouldn't be right" to give it to him, as it wasn't "a proper job".

It was at this point that I turned the PC off and sat down in the living room. As someone who has been unemployed for a long period of time, this struck a chord. Hard. Later in the episode, he is so desperate that he robs a bank, profusely apologising to the lady behind the counter as he does so, begging her to forgive him - and to not press the alarm button (which she does, as it is her job). His completely desolate state, which ultimately leads him to turn to doing something he feels awful for doing, is very powerful to watch.

Not everyone knows that he was made redundant 5 months ago, though - not even his wife. However, she finds out later in the episode (talk about one guy having a shitty day), and goes on to confront him. Despite his protestations that he didn't want to worry her while she was pregnant - especially as she suffered a miscarriage in the past - she is furious with him, demanding to know when he was going to tell her. He replies "I don't know; 'cos everyday, I thought, 'well I'll get something', but there are no jobs, Diane". She angrily snaps back "no bloody jobs? Have you tried looking in paper?!", to which he responds - after a brief pause, and a stare that every unemployed person can relate to, a stare that clearly says "you have no fucking idea how hard it is" - that's he looked every day. She then asks him what else he's been doing; through a mixture of anger and tears, he reels off everything he's tried, including asking the bank for a loan, going to interviews, to visiting the JobCentre. It was incredibly moving to watch, and it truly resonated with me.

There are a lot of things that were great about the first episode of this programme; it was gritty, dark, emotive, and - the "woman who is cheating with her and her partner's sperm donor, who is also the father of her partner's son" aside - it feels believable and real. When, as the end of the episode, the 15 year-old girl gives birth to her child, it was truly beautiful to watch, and you genuinely felt emotion seeing her hold her child for the first time.

If anyone is interested in giving this new BBC Drama a watch, I recommend it. It felt very similar in tone and style to a previous BBC Drama that I loved called The Street, which was another dark, gritty drama, that had a total of 3 series, all of which were made up of 6 parts. Each episode chronicled the events that happened to a different set of characters, whose stories all intertwined with other characters on the same street during their individual tales. I recommend checking that out on DVD if you get the chance, too.

It is also nice to have something called In The Club that is better than that song by 50 Cent.

Link to the first episode of In The Club on BBC iPlayer

Thanks for reading,

Tom.

*To clarify; their sexuality is never disclosed. They are merely shown to be in a same-sex relationship.

2nd/3rd/4th August Catch up!

Hello! I am back from a lovely few days away. With Edinburgh looming (I am going up on Friday), these last 3 days, and my holiday with my friend's to the Peak District, I have spent an incredible amount of time away from my home recently. I feel quite the jet-setter.

2nd August

As I said in my previous blog, I planned to write some stand-up on the journey to London Euston from Tring; I am pleased to say that I managed this. I might try some of it out later this week, if I can polish it in time.

3rd August

To be completely honest, I didn't get much written. I was preoccupied by the board games based on Bargain Hunt (AMAZING) and Men Behaving Badly, respectively. Throw in Crash Team Racing and Mario Kart: Double Dash, and you have I think this is probably my first day since I started this challenge where I've failed, to tell the truth. But, really, I am not that bothered by this. Sure, I didn't manage to get something down, but if this little project I've embarked on gets me writing something for 6 days out of every week, then I see no reason to be annoyed at myself if I occasionally slip up, especially if I slip up purely because I was busy having a fun time! This isn't going to lull me into a mindset where I let myself miss days just because "I don't feel like writing today", or anything like that; it is just a genuine admission of the fact that there will be days in a year where I am too busy to take time out of my day to write.

4th August

Today, I have spent time adding to my superhero story that I started last year. Progress had stopped for a long time, with the "date modified" detail telling me that I last worked on this project on this particular project on the 5th of November 2013. Reading it back, there is plenty that could use editing/re-writing, a process I have started. I'd love to be able to stretch this story out into something more substantial over the upcoming months. The longest piece of fiction I have ever written was around 6000 words long, so attempting a novel-length piece of work is completely alien to me. Perhaps that is partly why I have put off working on it for so long? But that is also why I really want to work on it.

Tomorrow I will actually write something, instead of writing about writing, which is effectively all this blog is. BUT IT STILL COUNTS.

Thanks for reading.

Tom.

1st August 2014 - Tomorrow, we party.

Hello once again. Firstly, I must announced that my blog posts for both the 2nd and 3rd of August will be late. The reason for this? Over these days, I will be away from my computer, joining in the celebrations for the birthday of my friend and fellow comedian, Kate Cherrell.

Her birthday falls on August 2nd. As is customary for the birthdays of my creative friends (when I remember), I am going to use this opportunity to promote her work, so people who like me can give someone I like a nice, little, free birthday present, while having a nice ol' laugh at the same time.

Kate is one-half of comedy double-act, Biscuit and Brawn (she is the Brawn half). Along with Adele, they have made handfuls of silly, funny videos, that can be found on their YouTube channel by clicking here. Alternatively, you can click the below video to watch one of their videos.

Kate has also made videos on her own, as one of the members of our Vlogtober gang last October (along with Adele). In fact, the entire concept was Kate's idea, so she should be thanked for kicking us all up the bum a bit just over 10 months ago. Her solo channel can be found here. Below is one of the videos from her channel, where she makes cakes. She's like Ainsley Harriott for the Bebo Generation.

Hopefully this will drive a couple of views, subscriptions, and fans Kate's way, because she's really cool. The same goes for Biscuit and Brawn, of course.

I intend on using the 40 minute journey from Tring to London Euston tomorrow to write something for my August 2nd entry. I am leaning towards writing some stand-up; I think this is because I have often written stand-up before when on the train to a gig, so it feels like they go hand-in-hand (despite the fact trains don't have hands. Yet.) The stand-up will not be disclosed in a blog, though, as I much prefer expressing stand-up comedy ideas as they were intended to be expressed; on stage, in front of an audience. Not to mention the fact that the ideas/jokes will probably be unfinished, and I'd rather not release that area of work until I feel I have it right.

Tomorrow should be lots of fun. It is the kind of birthday party I like; videogames, food, drink, and lovely company (some of whom I haven't met, and others I haven't seen for far too long). Also, spending time with other creative types can often be great for creativity itself, so that's always a good thing to do.

Speaking of other creative types, I saw Dan this evening, and you will be pleased to know that we have both kept to our promises so far; he is making good progress with his novel, The Hawker, which I am thrilled to hear.

Now, let's get to the true point of this blog. I have just one question; is it wrong to beat someone at Super Smash Bros. Melee on their birthday? Because me and Jigglypuff are like the Muhammad Ali of that game...basically, in 10 years time there will be a film about us made, with Will Smith playing Jigglypuff. The theme song? Will's hit track, Gettin' Jiggly Wit It. It'll spawn a spin-off, The Fresh Puff of Bel-Air. Can't bloody wait.

Thanks for reading!

Tom.